disappointed. --- :(

i think jan has fallen aslp le..i could have guessed so when she din reply. :(
but i couldn help but to call her anyway.. call mi selfish..i dunno.
i eventually turned dis darn com off and tried to slp.
i realised i couldn.
fark.

gotta admit i was rather disappointed when jan fell aslp.
yes..i noe i noe..its my fault dat she's so tired...i MADE her run..ya..slaps myself. lol

but..u noe, i was so tired dat i slept my whole bus ride home. but i agreed straightaway when she wanted to talk.
yeah,i mean..fer mi , i would find means to kp myself awake whenever i cud get a chance to talk to jan no matter hw tired i am. i wud give up anything juz to have a word with her.
so i mean, its a lil hurting ya...
maybe i aint dat impt to her anyway..

it kinda got me thinkin in bed just now...
i dunno if i regret steppin into dis relationship.
i luv her
i luv her smile
i luv e way she pokes and tickles me
i luv e way she pouts her mouth
i luv her everything.

but this is too much for me to take i guess..
cant help feelin stressed. i dunno, i mean hw do u expect me to feel when ur gf's frens dun like you? i really dunno. i mean...gotta think in e long run rite?
and when u noe somebody else is trying to woo ur gf?
and when she lets go of my hand abruptly when she sees her bro or her bro's gf ...
i understand dat its a lil pai sei la...but..haix..u noe...fer a split sec, kinda makes me feel like i'm unpresentable ya noe.
of course i noe u dun mean dat, but i wud juz feel so.

too late. i cant just step out now. i'm totally into this le.
i guess this is just a test for our new born relationship.
1 mth 3 days. and look at wad i have become...
a love sick fool.

i cant cant cant sleep now. i'm realli addicted le...
gonna juz try to sleep. hecks if i cant. i'll juz stare into space. hw i wish i can juz remove my brain fer e night. i dun wanna think anymore.

***** tis entry is all abt my selfish tots, e other side of me i'm so unwilling to show. but hecks.gotta unwind or i'll blow... ***************************************************************************************

shit..wad have i done..i shudn have posted dis entry. but i'm feeling much better after some ranting. hope my dear girl doesn feel offended. but this are my innermost feelings dat i really dun wan u to noe..but oh wells.. i shant delete it...dun wanna waste my effort.

i'm still in a dilemma..to post or not to post?
to post or not to post?
to post or not to post?




FUCK LA...JUZ POST IT U DAMN WIMP!